So...I'm going to preface this with something. After typing out my previous post I made the decision to try and start posting again...and I figured I'd start with posting something I've been thinking about all week. I'm just going to type this as I can think of it. What follows is about me making a big change in my life. Probably bigger than my moving to Austin.
I'm thinking about changing my profession in life. Currently I work for a major computer company doing phone tech support. I'm been doing Phone Technical Support for a little over 9 years now. It's honestly the only job profession I've ever had. I've worked for a total of 2 companies in that time span...and have worked any number of positions within that field. I've been a regular phone agent, Level 2 tech, Manager, Shift Supervisor, back to being an L2, getting a job at a different company entirely doing various things from launching a support department and so on. I've done a lot of things within the Tech Support Field. A lot of which I've done at a relatively young age (I'm only 26 and most of those things I listed happened 3 years ago or more.) I am very proud of what I've accomplished...however I can say that I've never been truly happy with what I've done. Oh sure, I've enjoyed my work at times...but for the most part I tend to really dislike my job. Especially lately.
Earlier this week I caught myself getting really frustrated or stressed about things that honestly don't matter. To the point that I was literally angry at everything and everyone that had any connection to my job. I, at one point, actually considered just walking out and quitting. I didn't. I rationalized to myself that I need the paycheck.
Afterwords, I sat myself down and asked myself why I'm doing what I'm doing. I know this job that I'm doing was never actually what I intended to do with my life. I never wanted to make this my career. I remember how I got my first job working for a local Internet Service Provider in Houston. I was still in High school and had applied to work at Wal-Mart. On the day I was going to go on my interview my brother called me up and asked if I wanted to get a better job that payed more than Wal-Mart. I said sure...and he got me an interview and I got the job. I was still in high school working in the computer technical support field and I was getting payed more than all my friends. It felt good at the time...however I had never planned to stay there.
Then I graduated. Then my mother got Cancer and I put a lot of stuff on hold: School, looking for a different Job, etc. I stayed at the job because they were very flexible with my schedule and that allowed me to take time off at a moments notice to help take care of my mother. At one point I actually had a nervous breakdown at work due to the whole thing and instead of doing what most jobs would do, my manager pulled me aside, talked to me let it slide. I took some time off and things went on. I went back to work and just stayed and worked my way up the ladder within said company. Looking back on it...I'm pretty sure I stayed at the company because I didn't want to to take any real responsibility for anything after my mom passed away...and just wanted to coast with what I had. After a few internal changes with management that I felt were for the worst I started looking for a way out. A friend of mine said he could get me a job at another, much larger company, making more money and located in Austin, a place I knew I'd enjoy living in. So I went on the interview, got the job, quit my old job, and moved to a new city. From that point, until now I think I was able to keep myself focused on my job because I moved around to different departments as I started to get burnt out on each job.
Now I'm looking back and realizing that out of the 2 jobs I've had...I never actively seeked them out. An outside person offered to get me a job at the place and I just took it wanting something better paying than what I had available to me. I did try to go to college at one point...but my heart wasn't into it as my mother had passed away shortly before, and I just dropped out (much to the annoyance of my Uncle who was trying to look after me and guide me in life after my mother's death...for that, I am sorry)
So all this comes down to the fact that I've come to the realization that through a series of events, I ended up in a profession I honestly don't want to work in. Now I'm not saying all of this was out of my control, cause it wasn't. I made choices based on what was going on in my life at the time, and while they may not have been the best choices in the long run...they were the best choices at the time I made them. At least I think they were. I accept that.
However...I feel that I'm at a point where I need to make a change. I honestly can't keep working this job anymore without at least making some sort of effort to be somewhere else. I know that working towards that change is going to take a while. And I'm fine with that. Also, if I am going to make a change, I need to do it soon while I'm still young enough that a profession change wouldn't effect my life, too much.
I think I know what I want to do, and I've already taken steps towards the path to get there. Sadly because the school semester just started...I probably won't be able to do anything till the next semester, and that's fine cause that can give me some time to prepare myself for the change that's going to bring. Who knows. Maybe something will happen that speeds up the process. Maybe it won't.
The only sad part about all this is that I know that if I do change my job...whatever job I change to, when I'm able to, I'm going to have to take a drastic pay cut. However...who knows...maybe that will be a good thing.
Until next time. Maybe I'll have something fun to post about.
-John
P.S. I wonder if anyone is going to notice that I'm updating this again without me saying anything to anyone.
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